<h1 style="text-align: center;">29 Reasons Nightclubs Suck</h1>
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<p>1. Club-goers more concerned with status-posturing than having fun.</p>
<p>2. Club-owners whom find new inventive ways to treat their patrons like garbage, well-knowing when people are disrespected they attempt to buy respect.</p>
<p>3. Jerkoff doormen that let hot women in immediately and treat men like they're lucky to get in at all.</p>
<p>4. Doormen given the power to turn people away based upon fickle, largely ridiculous criteria.</p>
<p>5. Expensive cover even when a no-name DJ is "performing."</p>
<p>6. Obnoxious music intended to induce feelings of excitement and reduce people to their physiology.</p>
<p>7. Hollywood-level fakeness: silicone DD boobs, caked-on makeup, hair extensions, spray-on tans, faux-designer accessories, Rolexes, fat stacks of (mainly) low denomination bills, colored contacts, dental veneers.</p>
<p>8. Nothing really happens: options are limited to douche-watching, screaming over obscenely loud music, stupefying yourself with alcohol, or making half-assed attempts at "dancing."</p>
<p>9. Men are the big spenders at clubs yet get treated like second-class citizens by staff and increasingly entitled bar girls.</p>
<p>10. Overcrowding: sweaty juiceheads bump into you without apology. Divas get flustered that you're in her majesties' way when the onus is on her to maneuver around the crowd.</p>
<p>11. Bouncers with an axe to grind, itching to rough men up without legal retribution.</p>
<p>12. MMA wannabes: threatening others or fighting over inconsequential things.</p>
<p>13. Self-paparazzi: Divas in training constantly photographing themselves and their friend group. On-site attention whoring is a platform for more attention-seeking via social media.</p>
<p>14. Drink thieves: blackout drunk peasants that have the audacity of King Kong.</p>
<p>15. Lighting gimmicks and beer goggles make everyone appear sexier than they really are.</p>
<p>16. Primal behavior is rewarded while <a href="https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/03/22/breaking-the-ice-with-women/">meaningful communication</a> is largely impossible.</p>
<p>17. Women dance on top of tables or even the bar. Men naïve enough to join in are swiftly ejected by bouncers.</p>
<p>18. Cocky bartenders so fed up with dealing with drunks that they're scarcely able to treat anyone with dignity.</p>
<p>19. Lone wolf scrotes assuming aggressive postures near the dance floor staring down women and giving men the stink eye.</p>
<p>20. Mediocre-looking women with massive egos and overdeveloped bitch shields.</p>
<p>21. Bartenders and waitresses so unresponsive or annoying to deal with, you're forced to go with bottle service.</p>
<p>22. Bottle (lack of) service is a monumental rip-off: markup ranges from 400 to 1,000%.</p>
<p>23. <a href="https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/04/02/ten-types-of-women-to-avoid/">Women feel entitled to free drinks</a>. Men dumb enough to buy women drinks all night usually leave the club empty-handed and with a near-emptied wallet.</p>
<p>24. Ladies night: Spoiled females are offered free cover or cheap drinks by club owners, leaving men with the brunt of the expense.</p>
<p>25. Club-culture pressures average guys to behave like $30k millionaires in order to <a href="https://blog.loveawake.com/2020/07/13/meeting-women-in-bars-and-clubs-with-maximum-efficiency/">impress women</a>.</p>
<p>26. Club-culture encourages women to wear as little as possible. Feminism encourages them to act outraged when men notice.</p>
<p>27. Small, inadequate restrooms and stalls so disgusting you wish what was seen could be unseen.</p>
<p>28. Men proudly hold bottles of Grey Goose in an attempt to attract parasitic women.</p>
<p>29. Wearing sunglasses indoors is tolerated in clubs with stringent dress codes. (joke)</p>
<p>To wrap-up here's a clip from "<a href="https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2007/aug/13/fashion.comment">Nightclubs are hell. What's cool or fun about a thumping, sweaty dungeon full of posing idiots?</a>" by Charlie Brooker:</p>
<p><strong><em>I'm convinced no one actually likes clubs. It's a conspiracy. We've been told they're cool and fun; that only "saddoes" dislike them. And no one in our pathetic little pre-apocalyptic timebubble wants to be labelled "sad" -- it's like being officially declared worthless by the state. So we muster a grin and go out on the town in our millions.</em></strong></p>